Standing In Once Was
by pooky1402
Summary: Spike is feeling down but doesn't know how to express it without feeling he's burdening another pony with his problems so Applejack takes a swing at it. xD Yeah not too crazy haha. Also, no shipping in this one, just Friendship


**Standing In the Beautifu****ll**** Past**

The evening was very young. The sun cascaded light hues of yellows and cool oranges out across the little town it was setting behind . The sun would be setting very soon. The large hills and small mountains clashed pleasantly with the cool white clouds in the sky.

A small purple and green dragon crossed his arms as a small breeze swept past him. He, being a dragon with fire breathing ability, one would believe he wouldn't get cold. Buuuut try telling that to him. This evening, even a fire couldn't keep him feeling warm. His thoughts were clouded, his focus anywhere but his current location. Things on his mind that down cast his normally positive attitude into the dumps. Even this beautiful sunset couldn't distract his sadness.

He was sitting up top of the highest point on Twilight's library tree house... thing. The place of imagination, reading books, and silent evenings of writing to Princess Celestia.. the way he liked it. He was sitting a little away from the very spot Twilight Sparkle spent many a nights looking through a large telescope at the night sky. His violet friend spent many hours gazing up at constellations and configuring star charts. The setting sun case down trodden shadows upon the telescope at this moment. It was quiet where he was... it was only him and at this moment, that's what he wanted. That's.. _all_ he wanted.

It was weird for him. He wasn't one for feeling down. He had his spells sure, like any other individual. Like burning his eggs with his own fire ... SURE that was disappointing Or when he spilled ink on the letters Twilight asked him to write to Princess Celesia, it was both frustrating and saddening when he had to start all over again. But... this was a different kind of sadness. One that ebbed in his very soul to the point it almost _hurt_. Like a numbing pain that tugged at his very heart strings. It consumed his thoughts more than he admitted. All this over done thought had made him quite tired and he found himself closing his eyes, teetering on the edge of sleep.

"Spike?" A voice called out of no where.

His eyes shot open. One part of him wanted to hide and hope the voice went away but for a split second he became hopeful. For a split second his hopes climbed, and a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth "Sparkles?" He called out hopefully. He quickly got up, and started over to the door that led inside.

"... Sorry sugar cube..." Applejack's brown cowboy hat, followed by her bright orange face appeared from the hatch. She continued until she was all the way out and closed the door behind her as quietly as possible, turning to Spike with a small tied satchel in her mouth.

He could feel his face drop when he realized it wasn't Twilight but in the same second, his attention turned to the bag with curiosity He looked from her to the package. "Something for Princess Celestia..? As I've said before, I don't _mind _sending items buuuut - it's something for you sugar" She chuckled a little,.

"Oh? ... Oh! sorry! Here let me help you..." He replied and grabbed it from her, rather heavy in weight, he wondered what it was.

"No problem, but sneaking that from the party wasn't easy, I'll give you that" She smiled good heartily. Challenge should have been her middle name, she never backed down from a good one, _that _was sure.

"Applejack, you didn't need to... " He was already saying as he worked the small knot woven in the pieces tying it together. Upon unwrapping the last little knot, he opened the flaps to find beautiful semi precious stone and shining jewels.

"... Oh my gosh, thank you!" He replied wrapping his arms around her neck in an unbelievably tight hug.

"Well, you'll have to thank Rarity later... She brought those lil' gems for ya. But I told her you were sleeping upstairs and _prolly_ wouldn't want to be disturbed. And when no one was looking, snuck 'em up here. " She replied and proceeded over to where Spike had been sitting a little while ago.

Spike looked happily at the gems in the bag, he couldn't believe Rarity was so nice to bring them.. for him! He quickly popped one in his mouth and then after finally getting over his precious heaven, he found where Applejack had gone off to and walked over to her.

He felt a slightly ashamed. "Well Applejack I hate to be a rain storm, but I'm not up to a whole lot ... I don't want you to think you have to stay, I'm just watching the sunset" He cooly replied. Half was truth at least, he _did_ love a good sunset, but the truth was his thoughts drove him up here to seek some peace and quiet.

"..." Applejack remained quiet for a moment as she looked at the sun. She finally turned back to Spike. "Spike.. I know something is bothering you.." She spoke soflty.

Spike looked a little surprised in response but covered over it with, "Oh don't worry, I'm just a little tired is all" Spike replied almost too quickly. To be honest, he was feeling _horrible, _his stomach was in knots but.. he didn't want to burden Applejack with that, he knew she had a whole farm to take care of _and_ a whole house of responsibilities to top is off.

"That might work on Twi … but it don't work on me" She countered bluntly.

"..." He remained quiet.

"You haven't been acting your self lately... I figured you and Twilight had been going through some disagreements but I knew after a while.. it was something more. Applebloom reminds me of you, very persistent and somewhat stubborn when it comes to things quite like this." Applejack replied. At this point she sat down. She wasn't going to push if he truly didn't want to talk and would leave but she could tell at this point, he needed someone to talk to.

"It's just... I don't know.." Spike finally replied, rubbing the back of his arm, uncertainty setting in. "And no.. it has nothing to do with Rarity.." He rolled his eyes, his expression turning to ill amusement. He was so tired of being pestered with that issue he could almost feel his crush on Rarity coming to a stopping point.

"Yeah I could see Twilight thinking that, but I know that ain't it." Applejack chuckled once again.

Applejack knew Twilight had been trying to figure out what was wrong and obviously Twilight had figured it had _something _to do with Rarity... but Applejack knew better.

The mare remained quiet though, wondering what was going through Spike's mind.

"Applejack, do you ever... think back? Kinda like- .. oh I don't know, miss how things used to be?" He finally asked. His thoughts wondered and he still wasn't sure how to explain in words what he was upset about. It was more like a ... cloud blocking his eye sight and he was trying to contain that cloud into words.

"Well of course cider pie... I think we all do. Why... I wish I could go back in time, to back then as you put it, and quite frankly, been much less _rebellious_ back when my parents were here.. help them out with Applebloom when she was just a little thang' " She replied. It was something she constantly regretted. "But... I learn from these mistakes and I'm happy for.. well the here and now.."

"No but like... do you ever wish things were as they _were_ back then?" Spike spoke again, twiddling his thumbs. He kind of realized it was the same question asked again but it was already in the open.

"... That I do.. I miss.. when my parents _were_ here... back then" She spoke carefully. "Spike.. are you missing someone?" She asked instead. She couldn't imagine... if he did then she never could tell. He seemed like his only family were here in ponyville. Maybe there was something he hid from them.. _very well_ at that.

" ..." Spike still struggled with his thoughts. "Yes... I think... "

"Applejack" He asked seriously, " Remember the first party Twilight ever threw here?" He asked.

"Yes... I do" She chuckled. "It was a bit of a disaster, she wasn't very organized, we ran out of food, and only a _quarter_ of the ponies showed up" She finished up, a smirk playing across her face.

Spike found himself chuckling at this. "Yeah but it was fun, in it's own way you know? The memories from that party still run through my head. I remember Twilight rushing up stairs the day of the party. I had fallen asleep reading something and she woke me up to tell me to get down stairs and _hurry up before the crazy ponies get here _she had practically yelled. She wanted to throw this thing to prove... that she could to it! That _she _could throw a good party. She told me to hurry up, put on my bow tie on and get downstairs! So I quickly got ready and helped her out with the finishing touches. It was a bit of a disaster granted... but it was fun"

Applejack remained quiet yet again, thinking to her self of the party that had taken place that night. It was fun in its own way, the mane 6 of them and Spike were there. That was it. And they still made it fun.

"And then... well time had passed and Twilight had made some friends at the meeting she had with Princess Celestia at the royal palace She had decided on another party." Spike went on. "I remember that she had told me about it. To make sure I was there. Of course, Twilight being my best friend I was _going_ to be there no matter ... _what..._ you know, to show my support and all that. Time had passed quicker than I realized that day but I remembered. I was actually a little surprised when I got there. There were a few more ponies than I had thought, which was fine. Things had been a little more organized this time" He chuckled. "Food barely ran out, and well, no pony got lost this time"

"I remember that party as well... we were invited and we all showed up." She answered simply.

"And before I knew it, Twilight was throwing _yet_ another party. For quite a bit of scholars this time!" Spike replied, his arms starting to move while he talked. Emphasizing the point. He had been sitting next to Applejack but had gotten up. "She had told me about it... " He replied.

"You were pretty later sugar cube to that one..."

"I know..." Spike replied lowly.

If she hadn't looked away a brief moment to drink in the evening sun, she would have sworn she saw him shake.

"I almost missed it... _completely_." He said. His arms drooped to his side, like bags of potatoes.

Applejack cocked her head and replied quizzically, "Sugar-cube if your afraid Twilight might be upset for that I assure, no... wait.. _double _assure you she isn't"

"It's not that.. I don't really know how to explain it." Spike replied.

"..." Applejack waited. "Sugar cube, are you- "

"I think miss her .." Spike said.

Applejack looked taken aback. She would have never guessed that.

"Spending time with her... as a friend. Oh I don't know..." He started again. "I just... this last time I almost was mad at her scholar friends. She just seems to spend less time with you and I and our little group. She seems to notice less when I'm not there and it kinda hurts.. Of _course _I feel selfish thinking this though, that's why I keep downing myself and attacking these thoughts. I keep telling myself that I should only be happy for Twilight's success and be happy that she is meeting so many wonderful ponies and learning and growing and that I should stand behind her and support her completely and...-" He stopped.

"Sugar cube?" After a long silent pause. She looked at him, his back to her.

"I'm fine.. sorry" She heard his voice crack. She felt her own heart breaking right when she heard this.

"... If it makes you feel any better... I've noticed it to..." At this, he stopped moving.

She had!?

Keeping his head low, he walked back to her, and sat down next to her. Her hoofs were tucked underneath her like a cat's paws when it sleeps in a bundle.

He leaned his head against her shoulder, his exhaustion catching up with him.

"I'm sorry to hear things have become so hectic around here.. I know that she had been so busy lately" Applejack spoke. "Yes I noticed it...I don't hear from her NEAR as much as I used to.. I figured she was just reading more..." She shrugged her shoulders.

"I just... I kinda miss things the way they were. Back when it was just us... 7..." His eyes remained clouded with tears.

"I know you do sugar cube..." She replied looking to the sun as the last few minutes of daylight ticked away. Night time was setting in and the sky became illuminated with bright stars.

What stunk.. was there was nothing she could tell him. Twilight _was_ getting more popular but she was still nice, remaining to her true self.. she was just busier, that wasn't something you could be upset over. She knew the only thing Spike could do was support Twilight and that's _just_ what he was doing, but he was also hurting on the inside.

"Spike, you're an amazing friend and support... I'm just going to tell you, you're doing a wonderful job of being supportive and I'd be lucky to live with a little friend like you..." She finally spoke.

His breathing was very slow, he must had fallen asleep.

"I'm .. I'm so sorry Spike " She whispered when she saw his eyes stained with wet tears. She almost felt upset with herself for not noticing his distress.

She couldn't leave him there so she layed her head down on her folded hoofs and wrapped her tail protectively around Spike, sleep taking her as well. At least he didn't feel so alone now.

* * *

_Authors Note~ _

_SO! It's been a long time since I posted anything... x'D I apologize I was randomly inspired for this story and it... didn't quite come out like I had hoped. The idea started out really nice but when putting it down on paper it just didn't come out like I had hoped. :/ I definitely enjoy the friendship they show between Spike and Applejack in the show and since I love Applejack I knew that was who I was going to use in this. _

_But anyways, I do feel in some spots I got OOC with Applejack but overall I think I did pretty alright :P _

_And real quick, the artist of this piece was nice enough to let me use it for my cover. You can find the original piece here~ ?qh=§ion;=&global=1&q=sad+spike&offset=24#/d4ow6bd But be warned it's very sad! :p_

_Comments and questions always welcome, ~ Pooky1402 Thanks!_


End file.
